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session 06 . video & spam
A Barge full of children. [ God save us, his tone seems to say. ] A dark day this is.
Well. The lot of you, listen up: you are absolutely forbidden from Cabin 219. I"m just going to have to use all of these toys [ slow pan: someone's made good use of the replicator, because there are quite a few stuffed animals, little books, puzzles, rubber band guns, remote control robots, stuff??? ] by myself, and have all of this ice cream [ oh look, a cake and some ice cream, and also a big stack of sandwiches ] by myself.
[ Bit of a twinkle in his eye. ]
I am an extremely serious adult and can't be bothered with any of you. Good day.
[ spam ]
[ Cambridge spends quite a bit of his time rounding up children and stopping them from doing anything silly. He treats them like people, separates any fights, gives pretty freely on toys and food, and always listens.
Much of the time, he makes sure there are a few who need watching in his quarters, where the door stays open.
He may also let some into the pool, on the condition that he stays and supervises. No drownings on his watch.
He can also be found in the Infirmary to patch up minor injuries. ]
Well. The lot of you, listen up: you are absolutely forbidden from Cabin 219. I"m just going to have to use all of these toys [ slow pan: someone's made good use of the replicator, because there are quite a few stuffed animals, little books, puzzles, rubber band guns, remote control robots, stuff??? ] by myself, and have all of this ice cream [ oh look, a cake and some ice cream, and also a big stack of sandwiches ] by myself.
[ Bit of a twinkle in his eye. ]
I am an extremely serious adult and can't be bothered with any of you. Good day.
[ spam ]
[ Cambridge spends quite a bit of his time rounding up children and stopping them from doing anything silly. He treats them like people, separates any fights, gives pretty freely on toys and food, and always listens.
Much of the time, he makes sure there are a few who need watching in his quarters, where the door stays open.
He may also let some into the pool, on the condition that he stays and supervises. No drownings on his watch.
He can also be found in the Infirmary to patch up minor injuries. ]
no subject
[As he pans across the room, six year old Allison Argent spots things that make her eyes light up with wild, innocent delight.
Rubber band guns. Nerf toys...a slingshot.
So yes, shrieking into the feed like she's being killed to make him stop and show her the toy weapons again is absolutely necessary, Cambridge.]
My room has a two on the door, too! I can come over! I'll trade you for the slingshot! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?
no subject
[ He peers at her. ]
Aren't you a bit young? Are you really qualified for my bouncing ball slingshot?
no subject
Yes, I'm qualerfied. I can shoot a bow an' hit a target way far away! An' the bullseye's this big.
[She makes a circle with her fingers so small no light can escape, and even goes so far as to try and peer through it.]
I can't even see in that! But I can shoot it from way far away. Daddy says I gots all the makin' of a sharp shooter an' I'm gonna kill bad guys when I grow up!
So can I come have the slingshot pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?
no subject
But I suppose I don't have much use for a slingshot. I could part ways with it.
no subject
When she feels it's safe to talk again without exploding with happiness, she answers in a jumbled rush.]
I'll be super careful an' I won't point it at somebodys 'less I'm tryin' to hurt 'em or p'rtect someones an' I'll bring some good stuff to trade an' I'm Allison an' my numbers are close to your numbers an' I'M COMIN' TO GET A SLINGSHOT THANKYOUBYE!
[The call cuts out a moment later just as a hyperactive and excited little girl is tumbling out of her seat and out of sight.
A short while later, little footsteps pound down the corridor...then go deadly silent.
A familiar head of dark curls peeks around the doorway silently a few moments later, face all smiles.]
Are you the Slingshot Grumpy Man?
no subject
[ Slingshot Grumpy Man. It takes a lot not to laugh. ]
Well, go on. Don't forget the little bag of rubber balls that go with it.
no subject
She's never had a slingshot. She just has her real bow and her toy bow, and they both have rules. Mommy and Daddy never made rules about slingshots. And even her six year old mind knows the rubber balls can do some damage at the right range...
It's a real life weapon, and it makes her giddy to be holding it.]
This is the coolest thing ever! [She flinches then, suddenly remembering her promise to trade as she sets the slingshot down and scurries over to him while trying to rummage in her pockets at the same time.]
I almost forgoted, I need to trade! I got some good stuff to trade for the slingshot...
no subject
[ He crouches before her, bringing himself down to her height, or a little lower. ]
With this slingshot, you must promise me.
[ A dramatic pause. ]
Only bruises, all right? Don't put anyone's eye out, or you'll be losing those slingshot privileges.
no subject
I can do that! Don't worry, that's the rule for Nerf arrows, too! I won't, um, put nobody's eyes out with the rubber balls!
[She pouts at him, shaking a little finger at him scoldingly.]
But I made a promise, an' I always keep my promise.
[She goes back to rummaging for a second, then pulls out a twist of Kleenex and hands it to him very carefully. If he opens it, inside is a little pinch of shimmering black powder.]
That's fairy dust. It's just a little pinch, but um...that's all you need. [Allison rocks back and forth on the balls of her feet as she chatters away brightly, talking with her hands as she does.] See? You take a pinch, an' you gotta believe in the magic, um...an'-an' then you put it on your, um, doorway? An' it'll keep bad guys out an it'll keep monsters out an', um...it'll keep you safe.
An' no bad guys can take your toys or eat your blood or, um, make you eat broccoli.